Friday, July 22, 2011

Helo my name is peDro I have wrote a Book and I hope you like to want to Buy it on Kindil

OK, let us look at the facts. I am English. I was educated in the English language. I think my grammar is up to scratch. So why the hell would I decide decide to try and write a book in Chinese? Point being? I spent the entire day trawling through forums and blogs and bullshit, only to discover that these sacred realms of the self-published author are clogged up with a larger than preferred number of illiterate writers who have probably penned there masterpiece during the raft-ride from Cuba to Miami. Maybe they assume it will help their claim for asylum in the US..."I am here to publish my book"... as he holds up his collection of scribed banana tree leaves to the US Coastguard official...."Call that a book, do ya?"...asks the Coastguard. "It will be when my Uncle Jose finishes the cover."

Now I'm not saying I am perfect. I like my books. Every author must have a high opinion of his work (not too high though) there is always room for constructive-criticism and improvement. Here is the rough rundown of a conversation I had today with a fellow online author. I won't mention which forum, to spare his blushes.

TOPIC: Promote your new book here.

PeDro: Hello to all and welcome. My new book is now out and I want to tell a little about it.
John Jones is a high paid atorney. He is on the trial of his life. After 50 murders Jorge Ramirez is in court...... (you get the picture).

ME: Hi Pedro, Welcome to the forum but may I just say that my nephew writes better English than you and he is eighteen months old.

PeDro: Hello and welcome. Why you being so rude! (great punctuation)

ME: It is not my intention to be offensive but I must point out that perhaps you would be better suited to writing in you own language, which one assumes is Spanish.

PeDro: IF YOU NO LIKE MY BOOK. FOCK YOO?

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Believe it or not, this is the truth. Moving quickly along with the experiment.

2 More sales on Kindle. The Facebook Killer: Part One.
Smashwords has had very little action since I removed the free status of Facebook Killer. It has now been a week and so I am giving it away again and things are starting to move.

It is my aim to finish Part two within a week and then we will see if the lossleader brings me some cash.

So far after 19 days of this experiment I have earned $1.66. Now that's just about enough to buy a pint of milk, but taking into account the 20 kilometer drive to the shop and back........? But at least I am selling something.

Total readership, as of Day 19: 230

The Sunday Club has jumped ten places in the authonomy top one million. I know I'm onto a winner here. Stick with me, I'll prove it can be done. Support me and don't buy peDro's book.

Until next time and don't forget you can read my books online (for free) at www.authonomy.com

M.L. Stewart

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